goodbye friends i am gone

fakehause:

fakehause:
things u may be missing right now on the 2SPOOKY segment of extra life
kerry: you know, it’s really sinking in that I just ate hair
kerry: what is this 420?!?
[quiet chanting of “murder! murder! murder!” in the background]
“SANTA DOESNT EXIST ITS YOUR FUCKING PARENTS" “YOU JUST DESTROYED INNOCENCE”
“my liver was beautiful 30 years ago” -gus, right before chugging alcohol straight out of the bottle
kerry: look, its 2spooky, 3spoopy, 4…. spocky, ..5….. for the kids…
miles: what are they doing? what are they doing?!? what the fuck are they doing? oh, they’re moving a couch
miles: I hope you fucking die kerry: i probably will
kerry: hey guys? I’m fucking miles.
“this is boring” “OOOH GET FUCKIN WREK’D!!!”
gus: I wrote… some terrible things….. awful, awful things… for everybody here to do.. nobody knows
barbara: hey guys, seriously, maybe no more shots? gus: THREE MORE SHOTS
WHAT IS HOMEMADE CHEESE
*wheel alarm goes off* everyone: *cries of horror*
gus: you know what? I’ve drank more than them. and /fuck/ them
WE CAN’T SAY NO HE’S OUR BOSS
miles: what we’re trying to do is raise money for kids, that’s what we’re trying to do here today- but fuck gus, seriously, FUCK gus
gus: someone threw it away :(
gus: I want to say something. I started this company. YOU ALL HAVE JOBS BECAUSE OF ME. *high-fives Miles*
miles: I LOVE THIS FUCKING WHEEL *five minutes later* miles: I’m legitimately sorry
“STOP SPINNING THE FUCKING WHEEL” “I’VE DONE SIX SHOTS”
“Recap: Gus wrote ‘fight dracula’. Gus doesn’t know what it means anymore”
miles: just fucking give us money for the kids, please, PLEASE,
“SOMEBODY GRAB GUS- JUST TAKE HIM AWAY”
everyone: NO- NO- NO- blaine: GUS SAID SO
*gus eats the jack sandwich* WITNESS ME
JACK- THAT’S YOU!
jack: the internet is saying no! The internet never says no
miles: remember earlier, when I was talking about that line that I thought I would never cross? kerry: remember that hair you ate? miles, broken: yeah
miles: remember when I ate that hair sandwich? It wasn’t just because I have low standards. It was for the kids.